Halloween’s slunk away like mist on the moor, taking some potentially interesting hook-up opportunities with it. You never really know what your ideal match is until you’re talking to someone at a party with an axe through their head, and realise how beautiful they are…
But do you know what else is a thing of beauty? That’s right: the celebrity dating news scene, thumping like an open heart with new drama and intrigue. October brought us a shock that left us cold. As winter begins to settle in, let’s warm your cockles with headlines from the rich, famous, and frivolous amongst us:
Silver is the new black
The creative process can morph mutual respect between two people into something much, much more. We’ve been able to prove this once again, following the announcement that Orange Is The New Black star Samira Wiley is dating the show’s writer/producer Lauren Morelli, after the latter split from her husband in 2014.
Working on one of TV’s hottest properties made Morelli realise that women are a source of attraction in her life. Now, that discovery has reached peak levels of cute, as the couple are officially engaged. They announced it on social media, with Samira laughing joyously over her diamond ring, and the caption ‘Yes’ below.
Hazz-e made it?
Women across the UK sobbed into their Union Jack hankies when Prince William came off the dating market. “Surely though”, they reasoned, “Harry will be a free agent for a while? He’s just so roguish!” Aside from a dream punt for Pippa Middleton, we couldn’t put our finger on anything that would take Harry out of love’s doghouse like his elder brother.
Hence, we’re delighted and gobsmacked to report that he’s linked to Suits actress Meghan Markle, three years his senior. They’re keeping it on the ‘down low’ for now, which is understandable – millions of girls could be sharpening their pitchforks.
Rumour has it they’re for life
Princess and pauper tales always get us misty-eyed, and Adele’s love story with fiancé Simon Konecki is no different. On their 5th anniversary, Adele was playing a gig. The sweetie that he is, charity owner Simon replaced her stage confetti with love notes, caught by the adoring crowd. They already have a son together, but a different sort of confetti could be on the cards, since they’re to be engaged… Watch this space for wedding bells!
Bad boy Brown’s at it again
No-one can dissuade Chris Brown from being a pillock, even if every single member of Rihanna’s fan army is calling for his misfortune. They needn’t worry, because he’s capable of inflicting it on himself; the troubled R & B singer launched a tasteless, misogynistic tirade against his current beau on Instagram last month.
It included such nuggets as “We cheat on our girlfriends, but we don’t want them to cheat on us”, and claimed he’s the hottest guy on Planet Earth. Yeah right, Chrissy. And we’re just dying to hear your next album…
And with that, we fade into the distance for another month, waving happily to the celebrity faces we look forward to seeing again. This has been quite a stress-free period for the latest news, so long may it continue! Let’s hope nothing lets the air out of these high-profile love balloons, eh? Who knows – they might swell even larger.
Photo credit: Eva Rinaldi