We’ve all been there, right? You look back over the date you just had and realise that maybe your 1 hour treatise on the tapeworm your pet has was not appropriate dinner conversation? Or that the zeal in your date’s eyes as they described their perfect women was a little bit too intense for your liking?

 

Here’s what not to do on a date;

 

1.  Right, first things first. No matter how much you want them, no matter how late you feel you are leaving it or how much you want this date to be The One, do not obsessively talk about babies. Sure, if you see a cute baby, feel free to say, ‘Aww, cute baby.’ Don’t feel the need to go over to said baby, coo at it, question it’s mother closely about it’s every move and then have to be dragged away while sobbing incoherently about ticking clocks. Instant turn off.

 

2. Never be late. If you honestly cannot prevent it, call ahead, that is what phones are for. If you are going to be more than 30 minutes late, prepare to make up for it. If you are trapped in an important meeting/broken elevator/childcare situation, then call ahead as soon as you know you won’t make it and reschedule immediately. Never assume you can wing it through the meeting then run across town and just be 40 minutes late without telling anyone.

 

3. Passion is a good thing. Anger, intolerance or unending rants are not. If you feel strongly about a topic that comes up, feel free to share your feelings with your date – after all, you are there to learn about each other. However, be tactful, remain calm and keep to the point. Don’t become the overbearing lunatic they remember for lecturing them about the benefits of homeschooling through the appertif, the starter, the main, the dessert and the cheese course. You will never hear from them again and they will possibly escape out of the bathroom window half-way through the evening.

 

4. Lots of people are looking for love, partnership, marriage, commitment. Male or female, don’t become the dreaded ‘Bridezilla’ who details your perfect ceremony within five minutes of meeting a potential lifemate. You run the risk of looking more interested in the big party and the presents than the contract a wedding celebrates – that of lifelong partnership and support. Resist the temptation to interrogate your date about their marriage prospects and leave that chestnut for another time, when you are further into the relationship than the hors d’oeuvres.

 

5. Yes, it is scary and nerve wracking to meet someone for the first time, especially when you feel pressure and hope for that person to be, you know, it. The One. Being intoxicated is something alcoholics and drug addicts do, if you don’t want to appear to be teetering on the edge of sane control or about to be shipped off to prison for possession, refrain from imbibing too much or taking anything suspect. Unless you are an alcoholic or drug addict, in which case cancel your date and head off to rehabilitation therapy instead.

 

The moral of the story? When on a date, be calm, collected and view yourself from afar to keep yourself in check. There is plenty of time for them to discover your collection of garden gnomes, your need to eat a chocolate hobnob every day at 4pm and your desire to make tutus for future baby girls. However, save those gems for a later date, when they will appear charming instead of crazy.

 

 

1. When it’s Summer, come rain or shine you want to be outside. Even in the Southern Hemisphere’s Winter, it’s warm enough that outside is still a great dating option.

 

UK – Southerners, head to Exeter and the Clip’n’Climb wall for some lighthearted vertical activity. Chill off afterwards with a pub garden pint.

 

USA – New Yorkers, head to the Hong Kong Dragon Boat Festival to see traditional boats race down the river and to sample delicacies like sticky rice wrapped in palm leaves.

 

OZ – Try Earl’s Juke Joint in Sydney for some tasty cocktails and a comfortable atmosphere that will have you and your date chilling in no time.

 

2. Taking the kids along with you now they are on holiday? Here are some activities you can all do together.

 

UK – Zip off to Edinburgh and visit Craigies to pick your own delicious soft fruit and introduce the kids to the joys of fresh strawberries.

 

USA – San Franciscans, pack a picnic, head to the Kite Shop to be fully kitted out and then go on a kite flying championship with the kids.

 

OZ – Get them excited about space and the final frontier (for free!) at this NASA installation in Canberra.

3. Feeling flush, or really adventurous? Try these date plans on for size to really impress your date and have a fab time.

 

UK – Head to the Electric Picnic Festival near Dublin to enjoy a weekend of good music, international foods and dancing together.

 

USA – For sheer, terrifying novelty value, go to the Boston preliminaries of the Air Sex World Championships – yes, you read that right. Maybe not for the faint of heart?

 

OZ – If you have a few hundred dollars to hand, try this Duck & Wine evening in Melbourne and enjoy many, many delicious courses together.

We’ve all been there. Freshly arrived at your date venue, waiting for your, as yet unmet, internet date to wander suavely through the door and greet you.

 

They enter. They seem to be normal. They look like their profile picture. They smile and kiss you on the cheek to say hello. Thus, they have lured you into falsely having hope that maybe, just maybe, they will be The One.

 

Then it happens. Something about them, during the course of your date will be revealed and you will fixate on it. I mean, obsess. Completely and utterly be unable to remove it from your mind. The date will end and you will go home disappointed and ready to tell anyone who will listen about, well, that thing. What was it again? You know it was something awful…

 

Are you guilty of this behavior? Working yourself up to meet a person you connected with on Free and Single, only to convince yourself it could never work as a relationship within the first thirty minutes due to some indefinable characteristic? I don’t suppose you are just being picky, are you?

 

We all have little things that annoy us. For me, its the sound of people eating with their mouth open. Bleurgh. If a date lacked basic table manners or grammatical ability, I’d immediately downgrade them from ‘Possible Mate’ to ‘No way, Jose!’

 

So, in order to help us make a favourable first impression, I have a little list of no-nos that could be the difference between thirty minutes and thirty dates.

What not to do on a first date

Top Ten List of What NOT to do on a Date

  1. Leaving your coat/hat/gloves on during your posh dinner for no apparent reason.
  2. Not knowing when to stop drinking and having to be carried home or put into a taxi which charges extra in case you throw up on the upholstery.
  3. Talking exhaustively about your ex, your relationship, what went wrong, how you could have done better and ending by sobbing uncontrollably. (Hint: You’re not ready to date yet!)
  4. Berating the waiter, maitre’d, hostess, manager, or indeed, anyone at all is bad manners.
  5. Picking your nose, burping loudly, farting, dribbling, or any other private bodily functions should remain private. At least until your thirtieth wedding anniversary.
  6. Ordering lots of food, sending it back to the kitchen, getting continual refills, eating everything in sight and then patting your pockets at the end of the meal with a ‘Sorry, left my card at home!’
  7. Talking of ordering, let your date order for themselves unless they expressly ask you to do it for them. There is nothing more annoying than someone you have just met choosing your meal for you.
  8. Top up drinks unless you have both agreed. (Also see No. 2). No-one wants to be pressured into drinking more than they feel comfortable with, or feel forced into matching you drink for drink, even if you can down twenty pints with no ill effect. (Ha!)
  9. Start an interrogation. Medical history, past relationships, daily routines and dietary activity are all subjects that have no place at the first date table.
  10. Stand them up. No matter how nervous you are, or how much you are immediately convinced on catching a glimpse of them at the bar that they hold no interest for you, never, never,  stand someone up. You are not to hurt someone who is just out, putting themselves on the line and looking for love, same as you. Always give them a chance. Always.

 

Who has seen the TV show Dates?

I started watching Dates in the expectation that it would show couples meeting, give me tips on first date nerves, venues and fashion, and it has to an extent, done just that. However, the show deals with actual real-life scenarios as opposed to the perfect, ‘everything-will-work-out-for-the-best’ Rom-Coms of cinematic fame.

 

I like the idea of everything working out. I’m a romantic at heart, I like to think everyone will get their happy-ever-after. While many of the characters in Dates do go on to start new relationships, it has yet to be with the person they meet on their date. Instead, the show explores the idea that meeting a new person can help clarify your own purpose in signing up to an internet dating site.

 

Why Did You Sign Up For Internet Dating?

Have you registered for online dating to ignore a bad break-up? To try and please your family? With hope that you can escape loneliness? Whatever your reasons were for taking the plunge and signing up, Dates shows that that action is just the beginning of your adventure into the dating world.

 

I think one of the key take-away points from Dates is that one date, one possible match, one person, should not be the be-all and end-all of your dating career. Sure, a lucky 1% may meet their first internet date in person and they’ll both be set for life. How lovely. For the rest of us, it takes work, effort and perseverance. So instead of looking at dating as a second job, desperate to find ‘The One’ and get on with living your life together, try to see dating as a means of meeting new people who just happen to be single.

 

Yes, there is pressure to deliver on dates. However, if you can ignore that and just have a good time, relax and enjoy finding out about someone you haven’t met before, you never know what you could find. Some you won’t see again. A few may turn out to be good acquaintances in the future. You might even find a new best friend, someone you really connect with but have no special chemistry with.

 

Embracing opportunity, experiencing new things and opening up to new people all push you just outside of your usual comfort zone and help to create the person you’ll be when you do meet your other half for the first time.

 

Let this be a Summer of dating and opportunity!

 

You have your fail safe dating outfit – you know the one I mean, the Little Black Dress and semi-comfy heels for the ladies, the smart dark shirt and leather loafers for the guys.

 

However, when the temperature outside is rising at an unprecedented rate, what on earth do you wear in order to still be comfortable, cool and chic – without turning into a sweaty, red-faced, parched fish out of water?

 

Well, I have some answers for you. None of these outfits should require more effort than you would be putting into a date outfit anyway – some may even require less. They will all keep you cool, calm and collected, ready to meet your date in style and go forth to have a fantastic time. Let it never be said that it was the outfit that ruined the date.

 

Ladies

 

Formal

If you find yourself invited to attend a formal event on the arm of a suave gentleman, first things first – Google the event and find out the exact dress code. You laugh, but people have been shunned at excessively formal events for nothing more than wearing the wrong colour, the thickness of their straps or the angle of their headgear. I don’t say this to scare you – just to warn you that knowing exactly what you are preparing for is the key to success.

After you know the etiquette of strapless vs. plunge, coloured nail polish vs. nude and heels vs. wedges (never attend an open air event on grass in heels!), you will be better equipped to put together your outfit.

  • Stick to classic lines that you know suit your shape. A 50’s style dress is usually a winner, flattering everybody and helping to keep you cool due to the voluminous skirts.
  • Wear appropriately coloured underwear in your size – sounds obvious, but many ladies persist in wearing black thongs a size too small under their floaty Summer dress and heads up; we can all see way more than we ever wanted to.
  • Choose light, Summer colours and fabrics. Berry velvet is stunning in Winter, sweltering in Summer. Raspberry pink silk chiffon however, keeps you cool and suits the season.
What to wear on a hot date in the Summer? This formal cocktail dress!

After Work

Possibly the trickiest of all dressing situations – you have to somehow seamlessly mesh demure, hardworking, empowered women with flirty, fun-loving empowered women. Not to mention you still have to look good at a time you would usually be stripping off your work day clothes and slipping into some fresh and more relaxed.

The key with this one is preparation. Know how you are getting from work to your date, where it is and how to find it. Sort out your transportation tickets, or where you’re going to park beforehand. With all of the important stuff behind you, you can take that little bit of extra time to freshen yourself up.

  • Your hair is the easiest way to move from day to night. Pack some travel-sized hair products in your bag and remove yourself to the ladies bathroom once you’re done for the day. Wear your hair in a bun for work, then shake it loose, add dry shampoo and hairspray to voluminise and add shine.
  • Change your top and shoes. Ditch the smart shirt and blazer from your skirt suit and add a silk camisole or simple tee shirt and tuck it into your skirt waistband. Pop out of your courts and into some sexy coloured slingbacks or comfy leather wedges.
  • Touch up your make-up, with a little accentuation on either your lips or your eyes for the evening ahead. Re-fresh your perfume, brush your teeth and wash your hands. You are good to go!

What to wear on a hot date after work? A sophisticated coloured lace top! Casual

The temptation to wear shorts, flip flops and a vest top can be overwhelming – as can the temptation to just not move at all when it’s hot outside. However, it’s still a date, you want to look like you have made some effort! Decide what you’ll be doing on the date – whether going for a stroll, grabbing some croissants to eat in the park or heading to the beach for ice cream and paddling. Use that to theme your outfit and take all the stress out of deciding what to wear.

  • Keep your hair up off your neck with a sleek, stylish ponytail or messy ballerina bun. Use headscarves and hats to keep your head protected from a day out in the sunshine, as well as add a finishing touch to your look.
  • Feel free to wear a supportive bikini under your outfit to be ready in case you go for a dip in the sea and to avoid bra straps popping out from under your carefully chosen racer back vest top.
  • Wear proper sandals, with painted toenails instead of battered old flip flops and dress up your trusty vest-and-shorts combo with a lightweight cardigan in a bright colour or ditch it entirely and choose a pretty Summer dress for your date.
What to wear on a casual hot date? A cute cotton sundress!

Guys

 

Formal

Ah no! The dreaded suit and tie situation. Well, as with the ladies, its a good idea to do a little bit of prep work before sorting your outfit for your date – no point pulling out the trusty black suit if the occasion you’ll be attending has a ‘Summerweight light grey morning suit only’ policy. Consider hiring the appropriate suit if it is unlikely you’ll need to use it again, or ask around your friends to see if one of them could lend you the right style. Don’t cut corners – if the dress code says ‘morning suit’, don’t turn up in tails.

  • Fabric is your friend here – choose a suit made of a cotton and silk mix. Linen creases like there is no tomorrow (and no one wants to be ironing in the heat!) and man-made fibres will have you sweating buckets, as will Winter weight wool and tweed numbers.
  • Choose a light colour if possible – if not for your actual suit, then for your shirt, with a brighter accent colour on your tie. Soft grey and yellow work well, as do white and pale green.
  • Never underestimate the power of your feet to make your entire day uncomfortable if they are not properly taken care of. Slip on thin silk knit socks for the occasion, or if you know your shoes are comfortable, go sockless. Don’t feel ashamed to carry blister plasters, just in case.

What to wear on a formal hot date? A light grey summer suit!

 

After Work

This can be pretty easy for guys. Feel free to play around with colours and fabrics, but the classic cuts usually favoured for work attire will take you almost anywhere.

  • If you work in a formal environment, switch your shirt over for a fresh one, ditch your tie and leave the collar and top button undone.
  • If your office is a casual affair, switch out your shorts for some proper trousers and shoes and consider changing your tee shirt if its been sweltering that day.
  • Wash your face with cool water and gently dry your skin with a handtowel. Freshen up with some cologne, brush your teeth, wash your hands and you’ll feel much better.

What to wear for an after work hot date? Ditch the tie!

Casual

As with the ladies, determine where you are going for your date. You’ll want to be prepared at a moments notice to deal with possible situations, from a dip in the local pool, to a picnic under the trees in the park.

  • Proper shoes are required wearing in almost any restaurant, cafe or venue. Ignore your flip flops and wear loafers, boat shoes, even TOMS are better than the usual thonged sandal.
  • A brightly coloured tee shirt is always a good choice in the heat, but be wary of any with potentially offensive slogans – better to keep those for guys night, huh? Otherwise, casual cotton shirts can have their sleeves rolled up and the top buttons undone to keep you cool in more ways than one.
  • If you’re going with shorts instead of trousers, keep them board-short style, in a darker fabric. No jean shorts, hawaii print shorts or, god forbid, short shorts allowed. Ever.
What to wear on a hot casual first date? Jeans and a shirt!

 

Summer flings can be a lot of fun for dating singles

Times are a-changin’

Something about the change in season, the rising temperatures and the proximity of Pimms causes most people to start daydreaming about Summer romance. While you want someone to snuggle up with during the long cold Winter months, Summer is a time for getting out and about, being spontaneous and just kicking back and enjoying life.

 

Will you, won’t you?

Of course, the trouble with Summer flings is that often, they evolve more intensely and at a faster pace than a normal relationship due to the excitement of the season and the time ticking away until it starts chucking it down with rain again. Sometimes, this isn’t a problem, both parties having entered the fling with the knowledge that the end will come and thus savouring the sweeter moments of the tryst all the more. Of course, it doesn’t always work out this way and you have to think about what you want before you get involved with someone.

 

You’ve got a crush and you’ve got it bad…

If you have been single a while and have had no luck in finding a potential partner, then when a seemingly perfect Summer fling fills your days with fun, laughter and a feeling of intimacy, you are quickly going to find yourselves falling head over heels. When the fling ends along with BBQ season, you’re going to be crushed and even more unlikely to feel up to dating other people. So consider your heart carefully before jumping into any relationships you know can’t have a future.

 

Some sage advice to follow

If you have ‘The Conversation’ to discuss where your fledgling romance is headed, be clear about what it is you want and do not settle. Never remain in a relationship with someone who only wants a fling if you want something more. You can’t change them, you won’t convince them otherwise – you’ll only end up hurt and alone.

 

But what if..?

Of course, there is the possibility that your Summer fling is the one for you, in which case, let the relationship grow naturally. You wouldn’t demand answers about your future from a someone you had only been seeing for two weeks in the real world, why would you try that tactic just because it’s hot outside and you’re in a holiday mood? If the weather turns Autumnal and you’re still meeting up from impromptu picnics in the park at lunch or discussing what to do next weekend together, relax into it and enjoy. Don’t feel the need to start classifying your relationship or forcing it.

 

Stay in and snuggle;

UK – Spend the evening playing cards, board games and dominoes while you get to know each other better. Continue the date by meeting for Brunch at Honey & Co the following morning.

 

USA – Pick a cuisine from this List of Take Out Food in San Francisco and order up a feast, then build a tent in the living room, cosy up and watch movies, chat and chow down.

 

OZ – Check out the Standard, Fitzrovia, Melbourne for some at-home comforts in a cosy pub atmosphere. Catch a trivia night or their music festival, and stay cosied up in a corner people watching.

 

 

Get out and about;

UK – Pop to Edinburgh for the day and visit Alien Rock, an indoor climbing center that will smooth out any trust issues and help you work up an appetite for later!

 

USA – Whisk your date to the Santa Monica Pier Twilight Concerts in LA, along with a thoughtfully prepared picnic hamper and chilled bottle (or two) of wine.

 

OZ – I’ve yet to meet a women (or a man) who doesn’t enjoy the odd taster of chocolate goodies, so head to Hunter Valley Gardens, Sydney for their Chocolate Festival.

 

 

Travel somewhere new;

UK – Take a cheap flight to Madrid and enjoy walking the sun drenched streets, sampling tapas and grooving to new music together at Marula Cafe.

 

USA – Take a trip this Summer and head off to Vancouver with your beloved! Try visiting the Grouse Mountain Yoga Morning for sports with a view.

 

OZ – Hop on a flight to Singapore and explore some of the vibrant cities lesser-known cultural exhibits – check out these 11 secret museums.

 

 

You know the feeling.

Along with the dread of having to get your legs out (female) or shake off your rusty dance moves (male), the worst thing about the wedding season for a single person is the spew of questions asking for details about your life. More specifically, about your dating life.

 

‘Do you have a someone special in your life yet?’

 

‘So when are you going to be getting married?’

 

‘What do you mean, you’re single? Someone should have snapped you up!’

 

Yes, it’s annoying. Well, possibly infuriating. You just have to remember that all those questions come from people who care about you and want you to be happy. They just happen to be really bad at phrasing. Still, here’s a quick fire guide from Free and Single to help you make the best of a bad situation!

 

Feel Good (or at least pretend!)

 

Even if you are attending, through some horrible act of invitational mishap, your ex-spouse/partner/significant other’s nuptials, you need to squash down any feelings of misery, low confidence and doom. If you can, take a friend who makes you laugh.

If you weren’t lucky enough to be gifted with a +1, plan something good for the day after and look forward to it. Any time you start feeling a bit gloomy during the ceremony, or lonely during the reception, or just plain sad? Think about your plans for the next day. Concentrate on them. Plan what you’ll do and how great it is going to be.

 

Look Great (invest in yourself!)

 

Now is the time for that expensive haircut or the new watch you’ve been eyeing up. Not only will it make you feel better, you’ll look better…which makes you feel better. It is a loop of happiness, all starting with putting a little time, effort or money into yourself. If you can, get a new outfit or wear one you know you look fabulous in. Now is not the time to fade into the background. Make sure you are comfy, prepared for rain or shine and ready to meet any situation that comes at you with grace and amiability.

 

Be Friendly (just keep smiling!)

 

Everyone remembers the grumpy ex in the corner, or the sulky single downing drinks at the bar for all the wrong reasons. Be the single who works the room, asks everyone how they know the happy couple, compliments everyone’s outfits – you know what I’m talking about.

If someone is impolite enough to demand when you’re going to be taking a trip down the aisle (I’m looking at you, Auntie!) have a come-back prepared. I like;  ‘Why, are you offering?’ or ‘Oh no, are you and your husband divorcing? I always thought he was cute, thanks for the heads up!’ That last one might not quite come under the banner of friendly though…

 

Dating at breakfast time - what to wear?

‘Fancy a Bagel?’ Breakfast Date

Men

If you’re off to breakfast together, make an effort. To be fair, this goes for every date, but the last thing you want is for her to start her day staring across the table at a bleary eyed, hair-mussed, scraggly shaved example of manhood. Go to bed early, get up on time, shower! Dress in lighter colours but stick to smart silhouettes – ironed trousers, soft shirt, layering jumper. Come prepared to discuss the day ahead.

Women

Obviously, you have to dress for the day in front of you but stick in something special to give a nod to the fact you’re meeting a date first. Make sure you give yourself time in the morning do do your hair and make-up to your satisfaction and wear softer colours than you would in the evening. A white shirt and colourful silk scarf is a fail safe option every women can pull out of the wardrobe to look classy and pulled together early in the morning.

 

Take a date to lunch to get to know them better

 

‘Let’s do Lunch’ Date

Men

It’s lunchtime, your morning passed in a blur, you feel run ragged already. Head to the bathroom! Splash some cold water on your face and wrists, re-apply deodorant and re-style your hair if necessary. If you were super prepared, slip on the spare shirt you brought with you and be fresh as a daisy when you walk into the lunch date. Smart shoes are a must, unless you’re doing street vendor food, in which case have a back-up plan for where to sit if it rains.

Women

Your head is still concentrating on the details for that afternoon meeting and your nervous hair twirling has caused a frizz situation. To the ladies room! A wash of the hands, a spritz of perfume and a bouff up of the hair under the blowdryer serves to have you ready to charm and chat all through lunch. Take a smaller bag with you to keep your focus on your date and not your iphone. Slip a cosy cardigan on to break down the ‘I’m at work’ barriers and help you relax over lunchtime.

 

What to wear to the date you know is breaking up with you

 

‘We Need to Talk’ Break-up Date

Men

If you are about to ditch someone, tone down your look. Dress in sombre colours and at least look like you spent the last few nights in anguish over your decision. If you think you are about to be subjected to the ‘It’s not you, it’s me’ line yourself, dress like you own your own very successful company, have legions of adoring fans awaiting you around every corner and have only to buy a new deodorant to have women swarming all over you. Think smart shoes, fresh haircut, dab of fresh cologne. You’ve already moved on, baby.

Women

If you are about to commence break-up speech number two with your unfortunate date, have the decency to look average, or better, plain. Dark colours, nothing fancy with your hair or make-up, simple clothes. No need to twist the dagger, as it were. However, if you suspect you’re about to get dumped, look fabulous. Accentuate your figure, get a blow dry, wear your favorite lipstick and don some sexy (but walkable) heels. Accept the dumping with a glossy smile, then sashay out of there like you’re off to meet the President for drinks.

 

What to wear for your engagement

 

‘Will you Marry Me’ Date

Men

If you’re getting down on one knee, start off with a good quality, dark trouser – no need to have dirt decorating your knees for the rest of the day, especially as you’re likely to be either wining and dining your new fiancee or else drowning your sorrows in the pub with your mates. Depending on how you plan to pop the question, add a suitable top half of the outfit (polo shirt if active, ironed shirt if dressed up and tee shirt…no, never a tee shirt. Make some effort, please). Make sure you have a jacket with a secure inner pocket, natch.

Women

If you’re the one trying to make an honest man of him, good for you. See above. If you merely suspect that you are about to be proposed to, put some extra effort in. After all, there will likely be photos and these pictures will stick around for the entire rest of your life, so no pressure. Get your hair done before your date, keep your make-up simple and classic – anything trendy will date so fast and have you hiding those pictures within the year. Dress appropriately for the venue and get a French manicure, you know. Just in case.

 

CHECK OUT MORE GREAT ARTICLES ON WHAT TO WEAR: 

More advice on what to wear for a first date

Get some date ideas that nix the classic ‘I have nothing to wear’ wail by their very nature.

Planning your outfit along with your date

 

Taking off your ring is all about timing. Whether your marriage has ended due to divorce or death of a partner, the whole gamut of feelings that you associate with that relationship boil down to the one lasting symbol of marriage.

 

The ring.

 

Now, we’ll skip any Lord of the Rings jokes here and move straight in for the real life stuff: No matter how much you knew the relationship was over, 98% of people find that finally taking off their ring really gets that fact home to them.

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Others find that removing the ring is their way of signalling to the world at large that they are ready to talk about what happened.’

 

Often, the removal of the ring can be a calm acceptance of the end of a chapter. Others find that removing the ring allows them to finally let go of the old relationship and the pain of the break up and begin to rejuvenate themselves. Still others find that removing the ring is their way of signalling to the world at large that they are ready to talk about what happened.

 

Sometimes, once a relationship has ended, a person may keep the ring on. It may be that they are used to the feeling of the physical object being in place and feel disconnected without it. It may be that they don’t feel ready to admit to family and friends that their world is collapsing around them. Sometimes, it helps to see the ring as a symbol of better times, so you can amicably accept the dissolution of your love.

 

The long-term question, of when should you remove your wedding ring, is of course entirely up to you.

 

There will probably come a time when you either forget to put it back on after a bath, lose it while you’re on holiday or else just plain decide that today, you don’t want to wear it. If you are not at that point yet though, don’t worry. Removing your ring is just the first step in the rehabilitation of your heart. You cannot be ready for a new relationship until you have allowed yourself time to grieve the past and learn from your mistakes, growing as a person.

 

see the ring as a symbol of better times, so you can amicably accept the dissolution of your love.’

 

When you do finally remove it and you do finally feel ready to enter the dating pool again, you want to do so in the knowledge that waiting until you were ready to remove your ring makes you the well-adjusted person you are meant to be.

 

Ready to find love again.