Let’s face it everyone – we’re not perfect. Inside, most of us are shuddering sacks of jelly, second-guessing everything from the tie we wear to the unseen film we pretend to have an opinion on. Dating conversely allows us to show the best side of our sticky selves in the window of mutual expectation, papering over cracks with talk designed to make our date weak at the knees.
Considering the white lies that are acceptable on a first date is a fine line between horror and genius; some fibs may be attractive or, dare we say, endearing once the ruse has been rumbled, but go too far and you’ve sunk it. Here are some that you might just get away with…
Fake a Language
“Voudrais-tu du vin?” You ask. She stares at you with saucer-ish eyes, slightly perplexed you’ve started down this track without a build-up. “Ahhhhh – magnifique!” The cork pops, and you feel the rush of celebration, coupled with the fact you don’t know any more French than could fit on the back of a postage stamp. But it doesn’t matter. For that moment, you are an international savant of mystery – we won’t tell if you don’t.
The jumper is tight on your arms, and you haven’t mentioned the gym. Why would you? People who do are catastrophically boring. To score the winning goal, and let your date make the compliment for you, spin a yarn about the dark days of high school, when you were picked last for the football team and chased home by the big kids. They’ll be putty in your hands before you know it.
Be Overly Polite
How’s the steak? Burnt to a crisp? Bleeding from every pore? Too bad, because if you make a fuss, you’ll forever be that petty person who demanded a refund, scared the chef blue, turned the family get-together to your right into a cowering mess of hastily-zipped coats.
Getting annoyed at the small things on a date means you’re not seeing the bigger picture. Politeness goes a long way to keeping your bugbears on a leash. If your date is an awful dancer, don’t break their dreams of ballroom glory. Just smile, laugh, and join in.
You’re Definitely an Expert
Occupations define us somewhat, and the more niche your skill, the more interesting and exotic you’ll appear to be. Trot this one out carefully because if they get a slightest whiff of under-confidence, your date will just think you’re terrible at jokes.
Say you’re a geneticist who can spot a perfect complexion. Tell them your musical ear detects their voice is a B flat. For true romantics, explain the benefits of IT data inputs on your love life. If they’re a keeper, they’ll appreciate the effort.
White lies can be a fun and light-hearted way to charm and cajole your date. Get it right, and you’ll make your first encounter memorable for the right reasons. Just remember not to weave your web of lies too large, or it could be difficult to back out later down the line!