First off, I have to state – I have absolutely no patience for ‘The Rules’. My stand is if you like someone, you tell them. If you don’t, well, is it more or less awkward than the first option? Doesn’t matter – still, in my guidebook, you tell them.
I am a proponent of tact however, so if you don’t feel that your first date or meeting or skype chat or whatever illicited anything other than a wasted portion of your life, grow up. Everyone we meet and interact with gives us something of themselves. Even if they were the most abominable bad date you have ever experienced, just think – now you know exactly what you’re not looking for. Many people haven’t had a chance to narrow that down yet. It’s all about the silver linings, people!
What to do about it:
So, back on track, if you’re feeling less than enamoured of your date, don’t lead them on. Sleep on your decision and when an invitation to the second date turns up, turn it down.
- Don’t offer to stay friends if you really didn’t click.
- Don’t give them a pity date.
- Think of just one good thing, however insignificant from your failed date, cite it in thanks and then turn them down.
Even if they know what you’re up to, they’ll appreciate the sentiment of you not ripping out their heart and stomping on it.
‘Thank-you very much for helping me discover that fantastic little restaurant, but I don’t think we really connected enough for a second date.’
No need for embellishment, or the addition of further compliments. Say your piece and scamouche – no hanging around for a rejection coffee, no one likes that! Instead, wander on home and log in to your Free and Single account to have another try and see who else is out there.