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The temperature is dropping in the UK and USA and rising fast in Oz – but wherever you are, we’re all on the downwards slope into the holiday season. Make the most of your dates by exploring new places together and experiencing new things. Here are some ideas to get you going!

 

UK – Head to Castle Fraser near Aberdeen for a fairy tale date and wrap up warm for a walk around the walled garden together.

 

USA – If you’re taking your kids along to meet your date in New York, insure it all goes smoothly with a trip to the Big Apple Circus!

 

OZ – Enjoy spring in Melbourne with this selection of lovely picnic spots around the city.

 

UK – Here’s a crazy idea – head to La Refuges de Fondus in Paris, a short skip and a jump away from London. Enjoy the novel dining experience!

 

USA – Pop to the Butterfly Enclosure in Phoenix to enjoy a romantic walk among the butterflies.

 

OZ – Looking for a way to keep things exciting after a few dates? Head to Paramatta outside Sydney and enjoy a night in this luxe Park Royal hotel.

 

UK – If you’re in Manchester, head to the Castlefield Gallery to enjoy some creative and contemporary art together.

 

USA – Take a road trip out from Las Vegas to Red Rock Canyon to enjoy some fantastic sights and a stroll around nature together.

 

OZ – Get yourselves to Salamanca Place in Hobart for a date of people-watching, chilling on the waterfront and patronising cafes.

 

Confused that your friends and family tell you you’re charming, intelligent and hilarious but you’re still waiting for for that great partner?

 

Why are you still single? Take our quiz and find out!

 

1. How do you describe your dream partner?

a) Gorgeous, intelligent, funny, kind, well-paid – the whole package.

b) Anyone, so long as someone shows an interest!

c) They would be just like my friend, with romance thrown in.

 

2. Your singleton’s refrain is;

a) I shouldn’t have to settle for anyone less than perfect.

b) No-one ever notices me, so what’s the point?

c) All the good ones are taken already.

 

3. When you like someone, do you;

a) Wait for them to realize and ask you out.

b) Act into them one second and ignore them the next. Keep ’em on their toes!

c) Make sure they know you’re available and a good friend.

 

4. A cutie walks into the cafe you’re sat in. You;

a) You sneak glances, but otherwise ignore them when they catch you looking.

b) You bow your head over your laptop and pretend to be busily working.

c) Walk straight over to the bar to get another drink and say ‘Hi’

 

5. You bump into someone you sort-of know through friends. You;

a) Moan about how since you last met you’re still single and the weather sucks.

b) Ignore them, pretend you haven’t seen or recognized them and hide.

c) Say hi and have a quick chat about your mutual friends.

 

Mostly ‘A’s – You’re living in a fairy tale

Okay – love is about accepting someone’s flaws as well as their good points. Not to mention, what’s the fun in having a partner who is perfect in every way? That would mean they could never be at fault so the blame would always rest on you. Perfection is overrated, lower your standards a little bit and be willing to meet new people. See who you click with – then learn to love them for who they are, instead of for who you hoped they could be.

 

Mostly ‘B’s – You’re acting very unnaturally

You have to calm down! Your crazy hot and cold act is confusing, odd and a little bit scary. If you like someone, take a few deep breaths and keep your behaviour on track. Learn to be comfortable in their presence and keep to an easy-to-remember formula. Smile, say hi, compliment them and then ask an open-ended question. Remember to breathe between each step and let them answer and before you know it, you’ll have a conversation flowing!

 

Mostly ‘C’s – You’re not showing enough romantic interest

You’re a great friend and maybe you’ve known them for a while and are looking to take the relationship further. Maybe you’ve just met and don’t want to come on too strong so you’re playing it safe in the ‘friends first’ category. If you want a relationship with this person, you’ll have to move it up a level so they realize, otherwise it is never going to happen and you better get used to being relegated to that friend position. Little things; like touching their arm when they make a joke and you laugh, holding eye contact for just a little bit longer and smiling, broaching the idea of dinner between just the two of you and a lingering hug goodbye – these are all good ploys for subtly letting them know you would like more.

 

I interviewed a group of ten guys for this dating blog post, asking them what turned them off when dating a new women, what got them hot under the collar and what advice they would give to any lovely ladies looking to seal the deal with them on a dating website.

 

I found out a whole bunch of tips that guys are willing to share with the female species in order to better understand them and achieve greater dates. See, men want love too!

 

1) Guys are taught that they can get away with anything so long as they project confidence. Ever fallen for the charming dude with an arrogance issue over the man hiding in the corner looking scared?

Exactly.

Take a tip from the guys and pretend confidence when you don’t feel it for real.

 

2) Men can be super fragile. They are always told they have to be the strong one, the macho one, the one who can re-wire a plug. Sometimes they don’t want that responsibility on their shoulders.

Never mock a man about his sexuality – it’s rude, its crude and once you’ve bruised that ego he is not going to be feeling especially fond of you.

 

3) Dudes are more black and white than women. Think; ‘Man see, man want.’ If a man likes you, he will let you know. It harks back to all those cavemen territorial feelings. He’ll do whatever is necessary to make you like him back.

If he isn’t putting the effort in, or trying to impress you, then he is unlikely to be seeing you as a long term relationship.

 

4) Guys will never understand women. They can’t get into the mindset, they won’t see the problem from the same point of view and they certainly don’t have a chance of getting what the issue is if you scream or blank them.

When a man is confused about how you are feeling, or trying to make amends for something, communicate rationally enough that he can begin to see what is happening in your head.

 

5) No-one likes being lied to. Men (and women) appreciate honesty in their dating life. There is no hope of building a trusting relationship if your ‘sports-mad’ online date shows up for your first meeting and point-blank refuses to hang out in a sports bar, ‘cos of, you know – all the sports.

Stay truthful. Its tempting to exaggerate or embellish your life and interests, but at the end of the day, do you really want to wast time dating someone who likes your dating profile more than the real you?

1. Get Outside

 

Brogdale, UK – Pop to this English version of the famous Japanese Cherry Blossom Festival.

 

Boston, USA– Head into the great outdoors on one of these fantastic bike ride routes.

 

Sydney, OZ – Pack a picnic and get yourselves to the Taronga Zoo for a safari fun day.

 

2. Get Cultural

 

Manchester, UK– Check out the new collections at the Whitworth Art Gallery.

 

San Francisco,USA– Head to the Yuerba Beuna Gardens for some live music.

 

Canberra, OZ – Go to the Glass Works to see professional artists at work and maybe even commission something yourself.

 

3. Get Munching

 

London, UK– Go to restaurant of the moment, The Clove Club for a spectacular dinner together.

 

New York, USA – Get your glad rags on to go to the glamorous rooftop Ava Lounge above the city.

 

Melbourne, OZ – Check out the Led Zeppelin playing surrounds of the Parlour Diner and share a mega milkshake for two.

 

Go to an exhibition to show off your cultural cahonies

In the UK? Try visiting London for the Life and Death in Pompeii and Herculaneum exhibit, where you’ll leave with a real sense that life is precious.

In Oz? Pop to Melbourne to sample some of the city’s renowned art and see One Hundred and Twenty Seconds crowdfunding art project in Federation Square, teaching you to make the most of every moment.

In the USA? Why not head over to see Upstream Colour, a new film released in early April and enjoy a giggle together in the back of the cinema as the baffling story plays out in front of your eyes.

 

Head to a sporting event together

In the UK? Head to the FINA Diving World Series in Edinburgh to catch a glimpse of some of the world’s best high divers doing what they do, all while wearing nothing more than teeny tiny pants.

In Australia? Get yourselves to Canberra to support the Australian Running Festival and maybe even spark off some inspiration to attempt a marathon yourselves.

In the USA? Head to Georgia for the Golf Masters Tournament. Take a picnic and enjoy a stroll around the grounds watching the best golfers in the world make their moves.

 

Check out a food festival to share new tastes with each other

In the UK? Visit the Lancashire Food Festival and let your taste buds be tempted by the huge array of delicacies on offer. Don’t forget to share, this is no place for chip-watching.

In Oz? Check out the Kangaroo Island Seafood Festival and gobble platefuls of freshly caught fish, as well as enjoying seaside BBQs and campfire cooking.

In America? Find a festival dedicated to everyone’s favorite breakfast item and go to BaconFest, in Chicago to sample bacon from producers all over the country.

 

Have a great date, wherever you are and let us know in the comments whether you have any tips for date ideas to do in May!

 

 

Dating advice can often be women-centric or else completely unrealistic because it is published in a men’s magazine which strives to maintain a sense of macho pride. The best people to ask about how you’re doing on a date are the women you are dating. Of course, actually asking the very women you are sitting across the table from at dinner is likely to look needy and a tad insecure, so we are here to help!

 

We have gathered some advice from women about what their recent male dates could have done to take the date from blah to huzzah!

 

Top 5 Tips About Dating for Guys

 

1) Manners are important. If you don’t want to drive her off immediately, be polite. That means tone down the swearing in conversation, pull back her chair for her at dinner, offer to pay the bill, hold the door for her, chew with your mouth closed. Yes, some women nowadays find this type of action an affront to their feminist values. Most will just be charmed that you were chivalrous enough to do it.

 

2) Listen. The point of dating is to find out about the other person and in so doing, determine whether you like them enough to have another date. It is a proven fact that people love to talk about themselves, but by showing interest in what your date has to say, you will actively be proving your worth as an attentive human being and a great date.

 

3) Relax. I know it’s hard, everyone experiences nerves on a date. However, think of something that calms you down and then channel that calm, confident person. Women don’t tend to like feeling like they are terrifying their date speechless, so if you are so nervous about your date that it is affecting your ability to talk, try practicing by putting yourself in situations where you will have to talk to strangers.

 

4) Make an effort. It’s nice to know that you value yourself, it makes you look like someone a women could value in turn. If you show up to your date in scruffy jeans, a hoodie and a baseball cap then it just shows that you value your own comfort above the need to make a nice first impression on your date. Either that, or you’re a college student.

 

5) Honesty. There is no need here to go on a full conversational leap through the ins and outs of your dating life for the last four years. If you feel that you are a part of a situation that could affect your potential relationship, such as going through divorce proceedings or that you have a child, never hide this fact. It’s part of the package deal and if they like you, they’ll let it go. If it’s too much of a deal breaker for your date, better for both of you that you find out sooner rather than later.

 

 

Phew.

You made it through the big First Date. You survived the awkward ‘how-to-end-this date’ problem and you still wanted more afterward. You know you want to see this person again, so now you have to do the second date.

 

The second date is often thought of as the make or break date where you decide, once and for all, that this is a person you want to pursue or a person you want to relegate to the friends/acquaintance/other categories.

 

This is your chance to rectify any nervous first impressions with a great second impression. This is an opportunity to find out more about your date, see what they are interested in and discover if they were really being themselves on that first date – you can’t keep an act up for long!

 

Here are Free and Single’s Top 5 Tips for making the second date work for you;

 

1. Make your Second Date Completely Different from your First

If you opted for a dinner and movie combo on your first date, try and get out and about on your second. By breaking away from the usual date scenario, you’ll each be able to act more normally with less pressure on the outcome of the date. It will give you new ground to explore about each other as well – try going for a picnic, ice-skating or for a walk around a zoo.

 

2. If You Organised the First Date, Let Your Date Organise the Second

They got to see your First Date plans in person and that gave them some clues about your character that they clearly liked because they are back for more! However, mix things up and let the other person organise the second date to get a feel for what they think makes a great date and to learn more about them.

 

3. Don’t Play by any Archaic ‘Rules’ – You’ll Just Confuse Each Other

‘The Rules’. We’ve all heard of them, we’ve all bemoaned their stupidity or praised their effectiveness. But at one time or another, we have all sworn not to be the person who plays by those rules any longer. Well, now is the time! If you really, really like someone, waiting three days to call them back isn’t going to win you favours – its just going to give them time to meet someone else and decide you’re not worth the wait.

 

4. Have Open and Honest Lines of Communication from the Beginning

I know – no-one wants to be the person planning their marriage after the first date. However, you are much more likely to have a healthy, happy relationship with someone if you communicate together clearly and honestly. The moment lies, untruths or fibs get involved, things can only ever end one way. Messy. It’s a good rule to have in all your relationships, not just the romantic ones. So if you let a little white lie slip during the First Date (‘I LOVE baseball!) think about correcting yourself during the second date before you find yourself, 3 years down the line saying ‘I Do’ on the pitchers diamond.

 

5. Make an Effort, Just Like You Did for Your First Date

There is no point showing up to your First Date decked out like a glamazon if you’re going to show up to your second in your PJ’s (unless you are attending an oh-so-fashionable pajama party together, of course). Continue to make an effort with your appearance because it feels good to do so and because it shows you respect yourself. Self-esteem is a great aspect of a person and one that potential relationships need in order to survive. So find out what you’ll be doing and dress appropriately.

 

Who has a second date lined up in January? Tell us all about it in the comments, or Tweet us @freeandsingle

 

Just what is she thinking?

Ah, the minefield that is the female mind. A mystery to menfolk everywhere, I am here to try and give you a basic hand in deciphering the riddles that women can effortlessly create for the haphazard confusion of men. Hopefully, this handy guide should help you out on your next date.

 

She Says: ‘I have nothing to wear!’

She Means: Do not respond with the obvious. You both know that she owns copious amounts of clothes. You both know that at least half of them are clean and either hanging up or folded neatly away (or strewn across the floor dependant on her tidying style). However, what you do not comprehend is that she is looking for a particular outfit, maybe one she just saw in a magazine, almost entirely possibly that she doesn’t actually own. She is not only looking for the clothes, but also for the exact way in which those clothes were worn in that picture, along with the hairstyle and make-up. Probably the lighting, props and surroundings. Sometimes, she is not looking for an actual outfit, but the feeling that accompanies the wearing of the right outfit for the activity at hand. Basically, she is trying to create the vision she had of what she should look like, realising it is not going to happen because she only has ten minutes left before the taxi arrives and no styling team to give her a hand, and then wailing ‘I have nothing to wear!’ because for some reason, that makes more sense than trying to explain what the actual problem is. Ideally, offer to pick something for her. Then she can snort with derision, tell you exactly why that outfit would be wrong for the task at hand, pick a better alternative and wear it all day having replaced the feeling of confusion with one of smugness. Everyone wins.

 

She Says: ‘No chips for me please, I’m on a diet.’

She Means: First off, instantly tell her she looks gorgeous. Then depending on how hungry you are, either order a larger portion of chips or allocate about 5 or 6 chips as lost to you in your mind. Then you can allow her to sneak chips off your plate without getting annoyed at her insane notion that calories from a different plate don’t count. Another method here would be to cover the chips in a condiment you like and she does not, but that can occasionally backfire depending on how much she really wants those chips and whether or not she ordered an actual meal or just salad. Be wary.

 

She Says: ‘How do I look in this dress?’

She Means: The key here is tact and distraction. If yes, feel free to shower her with compliments, but be aware that she is unlikely to believe any of them. You could try a favourable comparison technique, whereby you tell her you didn’t like the dress on the model, until you saw it on her. If the answer would honestly be no however – I repeat; tact and distraction! First off, say it looks good. Then, before she can say anything (but she has started pulling that face) pick a detail about the dress and point out how it doesn’t do her figure/legs/colouring justice and you think she would look even better in a dress that highlighted her figure/legs/colouring – get my drift here?

 

What other lines do the ladies give you that get you all confused? Send them in in the comments or tweet me @freeandsingle and I’ll have a go at translating!