together

Merry Christmas from Free and Single!

 

How is everyone’s day going so far? Hopefully you got a lie-in, some snow and are about to tuck in to a tasty festive breakfast.

 

Here are our Five Festive Top Tips for Sharing Christmas for the First Time:

 

1. Share your Christmas traditions. You can incorporate each others usual Christmas day routine while adding some new twists to be shared just between the two of you. Try some new side dishes along with your main meal or spend half the day in your PJs and half in your fancy clothes.

 

2. If you are spending the day with your partner’s family, make sure you pre-schedule some alone time to get your bearings and relax a little in between the rounds of conversational gambits and questioning.

 

3. Take a time out to phone your family or friends to swap greetings in the morning while you each get ready for the big day, to prevent you from feeling like you left a usual activity unfulfilled.

 

4. If you have any dietary requirements or major menu traditions that differ slightly from the traditional, make sure you have back-up options in place to avoid dismayed looks when your partner announces to your mother ‘Sorry, I don’t eat turkey. I’m a vegetarian.’

 

5. If you don’t actually celebrate Christmas, but your new partner does, decide how you feel about being involved and feel free to join in the non-religious aspects of the day and discuss them doing the same for your special festival days.

 

Here’s to a great day, lots of food and some fun times.

Have a good one everyone.

So, you think you are ready. In ‘that place.’ You reckon you are prepared to start dating again.

 

Take our Free and Single quiz to give you an idea of whether you are really ready to handle the excitement of dating, of meeting new people and of putting yourself ‘out there’. It can make you feel vulnerable, so you want to be certain you are in the best possible frame of mind before you jump in the deep end!

 

1) If you bumped into your ex this evening at the pub, what would you do?

 

a) Ignore them completely, pretend you never saw them and walk back to your friends.

 

b) Say ‘hi’, then go on with your trip to the bar and continue with your evening, no harm, no foul.

 

c) Stutter a word that could be ‘hi’, blush and stumble out the door on your way home to eat ice cream.

 

2) Do you find yourself telling others about what went wrong?

 

a) Sometimes, if I’m having a particularly bad day or they seem to be in a similar situation.

 

b) Constantly. If I’m not telling people, I’m thinking about it. All. The. Time.

 

c) Not really, I don’t dwell on it. The past is the past after all!

 

3) Did you learn anything about yourself from your last relationship?

 

a) I found that no matter how hard it gets, I can always survive it.

 

b) I discovered that sometimes you have to compromise.

 

c) I learnt that most everything that went wrong was because of my partner.

 

4) A love song hits the charts. How does it make you feel?

 

a) Broken inside. I used to have that. Now I’ll be alone forever.

 

b) Hopeful. I know what that feels like and I know I’ll feel it again.

 

c) Grumpy. Yeah, yeah, what’s so special about love anyway?

 

5) Picture this: Your ex knocks on your door, they want you back! Do you;

 

a) Invite them in for tea and to discuss their reasons.

 

b) Leap into their arms and accept immediately, no hesitation.

 

c) Politely decline, telling them you had a wonderful relationship but it ended for a reason.

 

 

Tot up your answers to see where your emotional state is…

 

1. a) 2  b) 3  c) 1

2. a) 2  b) 1  c) 3

3. a) 3  b) 2  c) 1

4. a) 1  b) 3   c) 2

5. a) 2  b) 1   c) 3

 

You scored between 12 and 15…

 

Wahey! You’ve taken the time, you’ve accepted the relationship is over and you’re remembering the good times fondly, ready to move on and start dating again!

 

You scored between 8 and 11…

 

Hmm, you’re close and its possible a new path is ready to be taken. Might be better to head for a new coffee shop with your pals or a different class at the gym before diving into dating again though.

 

You scored between 5 and 7…

 

Oh er – you are in no fit state to be entrusting your wellbeing to the success or failure of dates with strangers! Take some more time (ideally a holiday) and try some new things out to get back on track and move on from your ex.

 

Summer fling or blossom into a full relationship?

 

While Summer has not exactly been a blast of hot air this year (more of a damp squib!) there are still great things you can plan to make your days off from the daily grind that bit more exciting. How best to experience new adventures, than with a new person to help explore and shine a new perspective on things?

 

For the health nut who likes to check on Fit Free and Single, why not charm a skittish athlete into discovering the joys of an early morning run? Indeed, a day trip could be created to visit a new area, take in a view, play Frisbee or mini golf and then partake in a tasty, well-balanced picnic. Even if the weather backs out on you, I find nothing can bring together new people like competition. Head to an indoor leisure centre for a frolic in the pool, a friendly battle in the squash courts or even head to the pub for a game of snooker or darts.

 

Summer for the Mature Free and Single can open up a whole world of opportunities. When you know there are places you wish to visit, but the appeal lessens without someone to accompany you? Find a likely compatriot on Free and Single and you can spend the entire season, (and beyond!) exploring new ground and reminiscing about previous adventures. I think a stroll along the coast in Cornwall or Kent, followed by fresh seafood and leisurely drinks is a sure fire way to entertain. Maybe you would prefer something even more cultural and could take a day trip to a local gallery or a hands-on craft activity such as pottery painting?

 

Come back for part two where I muse on date ideas for Young Free and Singles and Free and Single Parents!