internet dating

Relationships. At the end of the day, if you’re reading this blog, visiting Free and Single and browsing dating profiles, it is for a purpose. You’re not here for kicks, you’re on the hunt for a potential life partner.


Now, first, before we go any further; I beg you, have you thought this through? When you picture a ‘relationship’ are you seeing the ups, the downs, the good times and the arguments? Or are you rosily contemplating a life filled with chocolates, red roses and sunsets?


Relationships take work. Not back-breaking, miserable Monday-morning feeling work (if it feels like that, it might be time to call it a day). But work nonetheless. There will be days when, say, you’re hungover and want to nap, but your other half is sick and needs you to go out and get cough medicine. There will be times when you really want to go shopping, but it’s the only day your partner’s parents are in town for a visit. There will be points where you question why you are together at all.


However, there should also be some serious ‘ups’! Surprise bouquets and being whisked off to the theatre, voluntarily skipping Saturday’s game to accompany you to your best friend’s wedding. These good moments make the work and the compromises easier, make them worth it. At the end of the day, you know you have someone who will support you, look after you and laugh at your jokes.


Here are some tips for working that relationship:


  1. Never go to bed angry. Ever. No matter how annoyed you are, no matter how tired. Calmly, without shouting, explain that you’re hurt, you’re not happy with the situation, but that you really need to sleep right now or you’ll mess up your big meeting tomorrow. Schedule some time to talk about the issue as soon as possible the next day. Move the venue for the discussion to neutral territory, somewhere public where you can’t shout at each other. Then give them a hug and a kiss and go to bed. The thinking space alone should help resolve the issue the next day.
  2. Now you’re in a couple, you have to think about what the other person would like. If you’re not into that and you don’t understand the word ‘compromise’ then you are not ready to handle a relationship.
  3. Keep the surprise, the suspense and the excitement. Thoughtful gestures, little gifts, compliments, asking for details about their day – all small acts that add up to keep the love burning.
  4. Listen to each other. One of the all-time most important tips for anyone, in any situation, be it dating, friends or relationships. From listening comes true intimacy, true connection and lasting love. You will learn about the other person, you will learn about yourself and you will form a bond that transcends the ordinary.
  5. Keep lines of communication open. Your life is no longer just about you, now you’re sharing it with someone else. You don’t have to report your every move to each other, but if you’ve agreed to meet up and you’re late, show a little common courtesy and phone to tell them. Even if you feel restricted by the interest your other half shows in your whereabouts, it could simply be that they are worried about you. When you’re late, instead of rationally explaining it away as traffic difficulties, they are picturing you mugged and bleeding in an alleyway.


If you’ve been dating for a while, or even if you’ve just started, the change in seasons always gets us thinking about how to change ourselves, be better and reach our full potential. The gap between seasons is traditionally when people do the most clothes shopping, get their hair cut or invest in new beauty products to see them through the new season.


It’s the same with dating. You want to be the best you can be when you head out on a date. It leaves you confident, filled to the brim with self-esteem and ready for anything – be that a another random blind date or the potential meeting of the love of your life.


Here’s our five top tips for getting the Springtime feeling into your dates. Enjoy!


1) Add more vegetables to your diet. Start adding in more coloured fruit and veg as the produce comes into season and boost your vitamin and mineral counts. This will result in healthier skin, hair and body, you’ll feel 100% better and you’ll be looking good too.


2) Clothing. Dump those dark, dingy tones that took you from work to bar during the rainy season and consign your coat to the back of your wardrobe. Invest in some lighter, brighter new colours, knits and prints to instantly lift your mood and make you feel more optimistic.


3) Have a laugh! Head so a comedy film, or have a great night out with a friend who makes you chuckle. Laughing is proven to boost your mood and make you more attractive to the opposite sex. All that smiling will get your confidence sky high and you’ll be ready for an onslaught of Spring dates in no time!


4) Plan a trip. Now is the time to take advantage of all the early bird offers out there and book a holiday with some friends. It gives you something to look forward to on days when you are not feeling your dating luck is going too well and if you do happen to be heading into a relationship come trip-time, the holiday will give you some time apart to enjoy reconnecting with friends and family.


5) Start exercising. Yes, I know it’s hard to get off the sofa when the evenings are still a little drab and dreary, but think this way: if you had started a new exercise regime in November, you’d be fighting fit now with all the pain behind you and all the gain ready to rock at those Springtime speed dating sessions! So start now and be strutting your stuff on the beach come Summer.


Here at Free and Single, we know that while the first part of a relationship is fun, nerve-wracking and exciting, as you mellow past the first year or so you can start to grow complacent. You might start taking your partner for granted or under appreciating them just a little bit.


It doesn’t have to be that way!


The moment you realise you are guilty of not sharing a kiss with your partner on your way out the door in the morning, or that you haven’t told your partner something nice in the last 24 hrs is the moment you switch on your PC, flick back to this (book marked!) blog post and start reading for tips of how to reignite the flame!


Free and Single’s Top ‘Date Night’ Tips for Couples


 1. Organise time to spend with each other

It doesn’t have to be fancy restaurants or swanky mini-break trips (although, don’t get me wrong, those are mighty fine ideas!) but just put aside some time each week where you will spend some one-on-one time together – no TV distractions, no wailing children, no work overtime and not a single break to check emails. Check out our ideas for great dates here.


2. Make an effort

Remember how you used to preen before a date, but now you just grab any old hoodie before you head out? I’m not saying rush out and buy a new wardrobe, but think about how good it feels to have your partner stop in their tracks and mouth ‘Wow!’ as they see you. Just sayin’. Want to know what we recommend for that first date feeling? Have a look here.


3. Think of something you know they like

You have a head-start on your first date self here – you already know exactly what floats your partner’s metaphorical boat! You can actually organise their most perfect date, simply because you already know what it is. From a picnic by the penguin enclosure at the zoo to bombing it down a mountain on bikes, there is no need to play it safe with the archtypal dinner-and-a-movie combo – unless that is what they really, really love.


What are your top tips for keeping the love as your relationship progresses? Do you have more tips on finding ‘The One’ and what happens in the Happily Ever After? Let us know in the comments!


Sometimes, the pressure of creating a great first impression creates something I’m going to call ‘Dater’s Block’. You know that you have some great dates in you, but you just cannot actually get them together. You don’t know where to start and then all your creativity abandons you and you are left taking you date to another dinner and a movie evening. Oh, the originality.


Free and Single to the rescue! We’ve had a think and come up with five brilliant ideas for first dates right up to date nights when you are already in a relationship. Let us know what you think and tell us any more date ideas you’ve had in the comments!


5 Great Date Ideas for our Free and Single Online Daters!


  1. Visit a big Zoo and make a day trip of it – you’ll be walking around together, with a constant stream of new conversation starters should you be worried about what to talk about and no-one can fail to be entertained by penguins, intrigued by reptiles and adoring of the monkeys antics.
  2. Why not hire a cool car (I’m thinking drop top if its sunny and monster 4×4 if its been raining) and go for a drive to a good pub for lunch? Feel the wind in your hair and pretend you’re both 40s movie stars or else bang on your wellies and go for a spin on a muddy cross country track.
  3. Try a treasure hunt. Decide on an end location (we like the sound of a boutique coffee bar or maybe an exhibition your date has expressed an interest in) and leave behind clues for your date to work out where they should meet you.
  4. Get down to your local leisure centre (stay with me here, I know it is not the usual location for a date!) and hire a table tennis table. Start a mini tournament between yourself and your date, add in prizes and forfeits and have a good old giggle at each others cross serves.
  5. Join an outdoor tai chi class in a big public park and keep a straight face. Help each other out and take the opportunity to learn something new and chill out. Afterward, you can go for a virtuous lunch at a salad bar or hike over to a doughnut shop and mainline a sugar glazed triple chocolate filled deep fried delight.


Have fun on your dates! Let us know how they went in the comments!

You took the quiz; Are you Ready to Start Internet Dating? You ventured onto Free and Single and now…You have a date!


You have sorted the time, the location, the activity. You’ve thought how you’ll get there and back and you’ve told someone you know where you are going to be to stay safe while dating.


Whether you are a skinny minny, a vivacious babe, a rake of a man or a cuddly dude you deserve to look and feel fabulous on your first date (and all the dates after that, but concentrate on the first one for a moment, please).


Girls; play to your assets!

  1. Try to wear something you are comfy in – its tempting to go all out glamazon, but if you are a jeans and tee type of gal, it will really show that you are not feeling the dress and heels combo. You want your date to fall for you after all, not the ‘wheels and doll, baby’ version of yourself, so dress for comfort.
  2. Choose a part of your body you love and that you don’t mind showing off (so long as it’s socially acceptable!) Flaunt that part of your body and keep the rest under wraps. A good rule of thumb is legs or cleavage, not both at once.
  3. Best all-rounder outfit? (Seriously, works on anyone). Grab a wrap dress.  If you have a teeny tiny waist it will cinch it in. If you have fantastic boobs it will make a ladylike feature of them. Great legs? Slip on your favourite going-out shoes and bada-boom!

Boys; get smart!

  1. This is a first date, fellas. Even if you plan on taking her to an army boot camp complete with mud obstacle course, dress nice for the first impression and bring a change of clothes for the rope wall climbing. Then you can change back into your on-the-town outfit and take her out to dinner after you’re done crawling under chicken wire.
  2. Unless you’re planning on a full-on fancy, super smart date, go smart-casual. Don’t worry, no one in the world knows what smart-casual actually means. Approximate knowledge by keeping your shoes, watch and jacket smart, adding dark (clean) straight cut jeans with no rips in them and a plain tee shirt or polo shirt. Sorted.
  3. If you turn up looking like you made an effort and with a distracting bouquet of flowers, bottle of wine, or other knick knack, you’ll pretty much be set on a straight path to Good Impression. Throw in a compliment (about her) and some gentlemanly behaviour (open the door for her) and you score big points on the first date scale.


Now you know what to wear, it’s just a question of checking out our guide of 10 Things to Remember on your First Date for some pre-date nerve busting (if you’re really shaking, make a martini). If you’re looking for more last-minute  tips and tricks before you head out of the door, why not look in on our list of 20 Top Tips for Meeting your Internet Date for the First Time.


Good Luck! (Let us know how it goes in the comments – your story could feature right here in this very blog!)


A little bit of history to start with…


Did you know, a mere 84 years ago women were granted the right to vote in England? This strong push forward into gender equality continued a movement for equality between the sexes.

It allowed women more freedom to decide how they would spend their lives. It allowed them, in fact, the opportunity to marry for love instead of as a business contract between families.


Freedom to choose!


Women can now use this freedom to browse online dating profiles and get to know people they may never have otherwise met. Free and Single is an internet dating site that provides thousands upon thousands of interesting people who want to get to know each other with an outlet to explore, chat, ‘wink’ and ultimately, get dating.


We love to hear about your dates


We love to hear about your dates! From the hilarious, to the romantic, knowing how you get on after you have visited our dating website means the world to us. With your feedback (post it up in the comments!), we’re driving Free and Single to be the best it has ever been – finding you more great dates and interesting people than you could shake a stick at!


Finding ‘The One’ or starting a relationship


Some of our lucky daters even find ‘The One’ while browsing through Free and Single’s profiles. Check out some of our favourite success stories to inspire and ready you for getting your own dating profile sorted.


What are you waiting for? Get onto Free and Single and have the time of your life!



  1. Check there is nothing stuck in your teeth before you leave to meet them. First impressions count!
  2. Make sure your shoes can withstand walking – you never know where the night will take you.
  3. Have a look at this article on What to Wear on your First Date.
  4. If you absolutely have to wear those vertiginous heels for your first date, pack a few plasters into your bag.
  5. While you are packing your bag, stick in some tic tacs or other breath mint…just in case you feel a goodnight kiss could be in order later!
  6. Make sure you can comfortably move around in your outfit. Nothing worse than splitting your trousers as you sit down for dinner.
  7. Check out your dates online profile again before you head out the door for conversation tips and topics.
  8. I don’t advocate speedy getaways through the restaurant bathroom window. If you really can’t stand them, have an excuse ready so you can leave without them losing face.
  9. Make sure a few of your friends or family know where you’re going and when you plan to be back again – have a look at this article on Staying Safe when Online Dating.
  10. Guys, if it’s nippy grab an extra jumper before you leave. Then you can be all romantic and share your coat, without freezing your butt off for your gentlemanly behavior.
  11. Watch the news! Then if all else fails you can discuss the current world happenings with an understanding of what is actually going on.
  12. If you aren’t going for a meal, consider eating an hour or so before you leave to tide you over until you get back. Nothing worse than trying to feel the spark and only getting stomach grumblings instead.
  13. Maybe consider packing a cereal bar into that tiny bag of yours, just in case you start feeling peckish in the taxi on the way home.
  14. Charge your phone!
  15. Check out this dating guide into the mysterious workings of the female mind before you head off to meet your beautiful date.
  16. If you are really stressing out about your date, take 10 minutes to relax and try some meditative breathing techniques (we hear in through the nose and out through the mouth works wonders).
  17. Make sure you leave plenty of time to get ready. Failing that, sort everything out the day before so there are no last minute decisions to be made about what to wear or what to do.
  18. If you are in charge, have you sorted out reservations or bookings? Is everything good to go or do you have a few parts of the date left to sort out?
  19. Feeling out of it after a hard day? Take a quick shower or if you can manage it, book in a swift massage beforehand to chill out and get you back in form.
  20. Freaking out? Sit back with a cup of tea and browse our Top 10 Tips for the First Date article to get you ready for the evening ahead. Good luck!


I don’t think there is a single person out there who can sashay forth, confident and glorious to every date they go on.


At some point, you will feel nervous. This can be compounded by the need to feel you are not wasting your time and the hope that this could be the start of your very own fairy tale.


Here are the Free and Single Top Tips for the first date you go on (when you are secretly on a mission to find ‘The One’.)



1. Don’t Immediately Write Them Off


Take the pressure off immediately being struck by the love bug and search for things in common – look to whether you would hang out with this person as a friend, don’t write them off instantly because you had your head set on tall, dark and handsome because your heart may ultimately prefer blondes!


2. Seize the Day!


Live in the moment! Having plucked up the courage to actually set up an internet dating profile, ‘wink’, message and organise a date, don’t then spend the whole time fast-forwarding to a possible future scenario or thinking about tomorrow’s to-do list. Stay in the moment and really listen to the other person, get to know them and enjoy yourself.


3. Feel Good before you Go


Regardless of your principles on vanity, make an effort before your date. First off, it’s nice to know you care enough to want to make a good first impression. Knowing you look great and feel like the best you can be can really help your confidence and help you remain calm during the date. Once you have relaxed, you can concentrate on just being yourself and talking to the other person, instead of fussing about what you are wearing or why your hair frizzed up in the rain.


Check out our Ten Things to Remember on a First Date for some more advice!


Happy Hump Day! This Wednesday, I want to share some news to brighten up the fast approaching Bank Holiday (because you just can’t trust the weather these days).


This August Bank Holiday Weekend, we’re going to be running a number of special offers for all our lovely Free and Single members!


For those of you who fully intend to start the party the moment the clock hits 5pm this Friday afternoon, we’re running a FREE READ session between 6pm and 8pm (Which gives you just enough time to get home and grab some dinner before starting the search for a great date).


Now, I know all you Free and Single’s not based in the UK are feeling a little hard-done by the lack of public holidays in your neck of the woods, but, guess what? We’re so into the holiday vibe at the moment that we decided to give the FREE READ session to all members, in local time, whether they are in the UK or not! There is generosity for you.


The fun doesn’t end there however, so don’t worry if you already have plans for Friday night. On Saturday, we’ll be offering members who have been with us for a certain amount of time an absolutely free 3 day trial of the entire site!


Lastly, we know many of you online daters will have loads of stuff already planned for the long weekend but may be annoyed at missing out on these great offers to find perfect dates. So on Monday, we will be sending out a little surprise in your email – just because we love having you here.


So from all of us here at Free and Single, have a fantastic bank holiday, enjoy the offers and check out the last blog for some great date ideas.


Have you got that Friday feeling today?


If the ‘Thank God Its Friday’ syndrome is really catching up with you, then I have a great reminder for you – next weekend is the August Bank Holiday! If your head has been stuck in paperwork and to-do lists, now you’ll finally have some time to get online, find a great date and actually head out and about with them.


Not to mention, in honour of the additional 24 hours of free time stuck onto your weekend, we’re going to be sending out some fantastic offers for all our fabulous Free and Single’s – so what are you waiting for? Let’s get in the holiday mood!


I’ve got some ideas to share with you on how you could spend that all important extra day off, so have a browse and see what takes your fancy (ooh, and you have any ideas or plans, I would love to hear them, so do please leave me a comment).




If you are spending some time in London after the recent Olympic fanfare, you might want to consider checking out the outdoor film showing at Somerset House on the 25th August for a chance to snuggle with your date – definitely bring a picnic and a blanket!




Maybe you are a little further North than London and can head to Manchester for a night out. Why not have a look at the Blue Cat Cafe for some up and coming the music stars and fantastic beats? Listen to some smooth jazz, perfect for the over 40s dater who likes to kick back with a gin and tonic.




For those of you heading to Dublin, why not try out one of the many attractions of the Emerald Isle? My favourites are Dublin Castle and seafood at Aqua. Take your date for a mini break and enjoy Guinness together in a cosy pub if it rains, or explore the city like a local if the sun shines.




If you are feeling flush this upcoming Bank Holiday weekend, why not take your date to Paris? Try out this spectacular magic show and ‘ooh’ and ‘aah’ together before heading out for some of France’s famous culinary delights.