Dating Advice

I’m calling it. We are officially on the countdown to Christmas now. The window displays are up, the shopping offers are everywhere and a house on my road has been liberally draped in LEDs.

Get flirty under the mistletoe this 2012 with Free and Single Dating

This is the time of year to get caught up in the spirit of things. Kiss someone under the mistletoe, gift a flirty secret santa to your office crush and take a date out for some seasonal fun.

 

Lacking inspiration? Feeling drained after a long year? No fear, Free and Single is here to spark some ideas for fabulous Christmas themed dates, whether this is your first meet-up or you’ve been dating for a while now, try one of these and let us know how it goes.

 

Office Party

Now, this is strictly for those who have been dating for a little while – you need the trust that your date isn’t going to wind up drunk and dancing on the table, as it will reflect badly on you. Professional Free and Single‘s, this could be a great way to both network and enjoy an evening together. Multi-functioning date, I like it.

Don't take a first date from Free and Single to an Office Party!

Carol Singing

Whether you can hold a tune or not, a bit of traditional carol singing for a good cause can only ever be a good thing. Trust me. Wrap up warm in your most fetching hat and mittens, grab a bucket and go ye forth and sing! If nothing else, you should get some mince pies and a giggle or two out of it. A great bonding date that our Cuddly Free and Single‘s particularly like.

Sing a Christmas carol with your Free and Single Date Ice rink

Grab your skates! Pack some extra socks and work on getting that oh-so-cute pink flush in your cheeks while dancing on ice. Our Fit Free and Singles will love having a competition between each other to learn new moves – backward skating anyone? There are loads of beautiful outdoor rinks around the UK and USA this time of year.

Grab your skates with a Free and Single Date

Tasting the Xmas Menu

One for our fantastic Mature Free and Singles! These weeks before Christmas, every single restaurant is putting on the ritz and crackers to show you a good time and produce a seasonally inspired menu. Why not book in for a quiet weekday evening and sample the delights the kitchen comes up with?

Try a Christmas special with your Free and Single Date

Mince Pies and Mulled Wine

If you are one of our Free and Single Parents, you are probably gearing up for some serious Christmas madness as your kids ramp up the excitement levels. Take a time out from planning holiday activities and present shopping, sit the kids in front of a classic movie (We like Mary Poppins, An American Tale and Home Alone) and chill out together with a warmed mince pie and mulled wine. Bliss.

Enjoy mince pies this Christmas 2012 with Free and Single Online Dating

 

 

We’ve all been there – staring at the blank screen, trying to think of exactly how to fill out your Free and Single profile page in order to attract all the right people and none of the wrong ones. There is a lot of pressure (self-inflicted, I may add) to get your profile perfect. So good that you instantly attract your soul mate and breeze off into the sunset together. What do you write, what picture do you post, what do you say your likes and dislikes are?

 

Simplest answer? (Slightly cheesy, but hey…)

 

Be true to yourself!

 

No point looking like a Chelsea FC supporter when you have never in fact been to a football game and despise whenever it comes onto the TV. Even the adverts. You know what I’m talking about.

So, previously we have taken you through a list of online dating profile no-nos. Here is our next list of top tips to help you out at that awkward, life defining, preventable moment when you upload a five year old photo instead of a current one.

 

Free and Single 5 Top Tips to Make Your Online Dating Profile Great

 

1. Be original!

There is no point to spouting the same old clichés we have heard a thousand times before in every rom-com under the sun. Sure, you may really, really love to take long walks on the beach…but spice it up a bit. Is that because you find walking on sand really tones up your thighs? Is it because the sound of the waves breaking take you back to the calm on a childhood spent on the seaside? Do you like dipping your toes in or going rock pooling? Think outside the box.

 

2. Try not to be aggressive

It is all very well knowing, secretly, inside your head that you could never even bring yourself to date a man who takes more time styling his hair than you do, but ranting about must-haves and must-not-haves on your profile is a serious breach of online dating etiquette. Who wants to hear that, despite otherwise seeming to be a perfect match, you won’t meet up with them because you have a phobia of the colour red…which happens to be their favourite?

 

3. Lose the silly photos

Yes, yes, it may show that you have a GSOH. It also says that you lack confidence in yourself to just appear, as you are, sans red clown nose or mad Hawaiian coconut shell bra. Tone it down, show your humour with a witty comment or a well-turned phrase in the text part of your profile and know that you can show it off to your hearts content when you actually meet up with someone. No point putting them off at the first hurdle.

 

4. Stop posting shared photos

You know what I mean. The picture of you and two friends dolled up for a night on the tiles. First off, how does a potential date tell which person you are? Do they assume they get three dates for the price of one? Do they start running unfavourable comparisons between the person in the centre and the person on the left? Do they decide, ultimately, you are too immature to want to date as you can’t apparently represent yourself as an individual? Think about it.

 

5. Avoid listing your life goals

It’s nice to have goals, drive, ambition. Listing that you intend to be married by 32, with a baby on the way by 33, a second child at 35, a move to the country at 38…that is a leetle tiny bit over controlling. Potential daters want to know that you are going to go out together, have a fun time and maybe/maybe not meet up again. They don’t want to feel like they are being interrogated for a role in the ‘You Show’.

Find love with Free and Single Online Dating Profile Advice

 

Scuba Diving 

Try this on for size – a full length wetsuit in fashionable black neoprene with go faster flashes of blue. Wap on your shocking orange rubber flippers and a fetching pink snorkel set and check in to your local PADI Divers school to learn how to breathe underwater and explore the oceans like a fish. Perfect for Fit Free and Singles.
Great for Fit Free and Singles, Scuba diving makes for a different date night

Zoo keeper

Ready for a walk on the wild side? Why not treat your date to the ultimate in day out activities by booking yourselves in for a day as a zoo keeper. Grab your safari suit, floppy hat and desert boots (maybe pop some rubber gloves in your bag) and off you go. Picking up poo has never been so attractive as when it belongs to an angry tiger! Perfect for Young Free and Singles.

Young Free and Singles will love a day at the zoo

Cabaret evening

Feeling a tad naughty after the Summer sensation that was ‘5o Shades of Grey’? Why not grab your significant other, don some sequinned nipple tassels and French knickers (maybe put more clothes over the top, but it’s up to you) and head to a theatre club (like Proud in London or Brighton) for a light supper and a bit of burlesque action? Perfect for our XXX Free and Single Members.

XXX Free and Singles might enjoy a cabaret evening

Sensory Experience Restaurant

Bored with the same old dinner date scene? Do you get a bit nervous meeting new people? This version of dating will rock your socks! Head to a sensory restaurant (such as Dans Le Noir in London) and enjoy your companions company over a delicious dinner…in the pitch black. Wear your pajamas for all your date will notice, although I’d advise dark colours in case you spill soup all over yourself. Perfect for Divorced Free and Singles.

Great for Divorced Free and Singles who may be feeling nervous about dating again

Go Ape

Like to monkey around with a new date? Harness up and take it to the treetops with one of the Go Ape franchises. Wear tracksuit trousers, trainers and a fleece and then don your climbing gear to scramble around platforms and rope swings high up in the canopies of some of the UK’s best woodlands. Perfect for Free and Single Parents who can take their sprogs along to join in the fun.

Free and Single Parents can take their families along to Go Ape too

Venice Carnival

Got some cash to burn on your date? Why not go all out and fly to Venice for the Mardi Gras carnival? Hire (or commission) some sumptuous traditional gowns and suits and on no account forget the matching masks. Parade around the city on romantic gondalas and sip wine from goblets in St Peter’s Square. Perfect for our Wealthy Free and Singles.

The Venice Carnival is a perfect date for Wealthy Free and Singles

Horse trekking

Get out of the office and into nature by hiring out a horse for a hack. Saddle up and don your riding boots, hard helmet, tweed jacket and tan jodhpurs for a ride about the countryside with your date. Maybe pack a picnic too? Perfect for our Professional Free and Singles.

Get back to nature Professional Free and Singles, with a horse riding lesson

Dinner at a swanky hotel

Do you enjoy getting to know one another over a candlelight dinner by a top chef? Why not dress up in your finest (I’m thinking channel Vivienne Westwood-style tailored evening gowns and Savile Row-style suits), head into the city and choose your destination dinner. Perfect for our Cuddly Free and Singles.

Cuddly Free and Singles can enjoy getting to know each other over dinner

Salsa dancing

Fancy a turn on the dance floor? Ready to get up close and personal with your partner? Why not try a dating dance lesson for some unexpected fun and you never know – you might just discover a new talent! For the ladies; wear swishy skirts in hot colours and low heeled shoes with an ankle strap. Gents; don a fitted shirt (v-neck optional) and smart trousers.  Perfect for our Mature Free and Singles.

Learn a dance move for our Mature Free and Singles

Hot Air Balloon Ride

Splash out on a special occasion with a ride through the skies! Wrap up warm in jumpers, coats, hats and boots so you stay toasty while floating through the clouds in your air balloon. Men and women alike, remember your leather gloves – wouldn’t want that flute of champagne to fall out of your grip now, would we? Perfect for all our Free and Single daters!

All Free and Singles will love a balloon ride!

 

Here at Free and Single, we know that while the first part of a relationship is fun, nerve-wracking and exciting, as you mellow past the first year or so you can start to grow complacent. You might start taking your partner for granted or under appreciating them just a little bit.

 

It doesn’t have to be that way!

 

The moment you realise you are guilty of not sharing a kiss with your partner on your way out the door in the morning, or that you haven’t told your partner something nice in the last 24 hrs is the moment you switch on your PC, flick back to this (book marked!) blog post and start reading for tips of how to reignite the flame!

 

Free and Single’s Top ‘Date Night’ Tips for Couples

 

 1. Organise time to spend with each other

It doesn’t have to be fancy restaurants or swanky mini-break trips (although, don’t get me wrong, those are mighty fine ideas!) but just put aside some time each week where you will spend some one-on-one time together – no TV distractions, no wailing children, no work overtime and not a single break to check emails. Check out our ideas for great dates here.

 

2. Make an effort

Remember how you used to preen before a date, but now you just grab any old hoodie before you head out? I’m not saying rush out and buy a new wardrobe, but think about how good it feels to have your partner stop in their tracks and mouth ‘Wow!’ as they see you. Just sayin’. Want to know what we recommend for that first date feeling? Have a look here.

 

3. Think of something you know they like

You have a head-start on your first date self here – you already know exactly what floats your partner’s metaphorical boat! You can actually organise their most perfect date, simply because you already know what it is. From a picnic by the penguin enclosure at the zoo to bombing it down a mountain on bikes, there is no need to play it safe with the archtypal dinner-and-a-movie combo – unless that is what they really, really love.

 

What are your top tips for keeping the love as your relationship progresses? Do you have more tips on finding ‘The One’ and what happens in the Happily Ever After? Let us know in the comments!

 

Sometimes, the pressure of creating a great first impression creates something I’m going to call ‘Dater’s Block’. You know that you have some great dates in you, but you just cannot actually get them together. You don’t know where to start and then all your creativity abandons you and you are left taking you date to another dinner and a movie evening. Oh, the originality.

 

Free and Single to the rescue! We’ve had a think and come up with five brilliant ideas for first dates right up to date nights when you are already in a relationship. Let us know what you think and tell us any more date ideas you’ve had in the comments!

 

5 Great Date Ideas for our Free and Single Online Daters!

 

  1. Visit a big Zoo and make a day trip of it – you’ll be walking around together, with a constant stream of new conversation starters should you be worried about what to talk about and no-one can fail to be entertained by penguins, intrigued by reptiles and adoring of the monkeys antics.
  2. Why not hire a cool car (I’m thinking drop top if its sunny and monster 4×4 if its been raining) and go for a drive to a good pub for lunch? Feel the wind in your hair and pretend you’re both 40s movie stars or else bang on your wellies and go for a spin on a muddy cross country track.
  3. Try a treasure hunt. Decide on an end location (we like the sound of a boutique coffee bar or maybe an exhibition your date has expressed an interest in) and leave behind clues for your date to work out where they should meet you.
  4. Get down to your local leisure centre (stay with me here, I know it is not the usual location for a date!) and hire a table tennis table. Start a mini tournament between yourself and your date, add in prizes and forfeits and have a good old giggle at each others cross serves.
  5. Join an outdoor tai chi class in a big public park and keep a straight face. Help each other out and take the opportunity to learn something new and chill out. Afterward, you can go for a virtuous lunch at a salad bar or hike over to a doughnut shop and mainline a sugar glazed triple chocolate filled deep fried delight.

 

Have fun on your dates! Let us know how they went in the comments!

You took the quiz; Are you Ready to Start Internet Dating? You ventured onto Free and Single and now…You have a date!

 

You have sorted the time, the location, the activity. You’ve thought how you’ll get there and back and you’ve told someone you know where you are going to be to stay safe while dating.

 

Whether you are a skinny minny, a vivacious babe, a rake of a man or a cuddly dude you deserve to look and feel fabulous on your first date (and all the dates after that, but concentrate on the first one for a moment, please).

 

Girls; play to your assets!

  1. Try to wear something you are comfy in – its tempting to go all out glamazon, but if you are a jeans and tee type of gal, it will really show that you are not feeling the dress and heels combo. You want your date to fall for you after all, not the ‘wheels and doll, baby’ version of yourself, so dress for comfort.
  2. Choose a part of your body you love and that you don’t mind showing off (so long as it’s socially acceptable!) Flaunt that part of your body and keep the rest under wraps. A good rule of thumb is legs or cleavage, not both at once.
  3. Best all-rounder outfit? (Seriously, works on anyone). Grab a wrap dress.  If you have a teeny tiny waist it will cinch it in. If you have fantastic boobs it will make a ladylike feature of them. Great legs? Slip on your favourite going-out shoes and bada-boom!

Boys; get smart!

  1. This is a first date, fellas. Even if you plan on taking her to an army boot camp complete with mud obstacle course, dress nice for the first impression and bring a change of clothes for the rope wall climbing. Then you can change back into your on-the-town outfit and take her out to dinner after you’re done crawling under chicken wire.
  2. Unless you’re planning on a full-on fancy, super smart date, go smart-casual. Don’t worry, no one in the world knows what smart-casual actually means. Approximate knowledge by keeping your shoes, watch and jacket smart, adding dark (clean) straight cut jeans with no rips in them and a plain tee shirt or polo shirt. Sorted.
  3. If you turn up looking like you made an effort and with a distracting bouquet of flowers, bottle of wine, or other knick knack, you’ll pretty much be set on a straight path to Good Impression. Throw in a compliment (about her) and some gentlemanly behaviour (open the door for her) and you score big points on the first date scale.

 

Now you know what to wear, it’s just a question of checking out our guide of 10 Things to Remember on your First Date for some pre-date nerve busting (if you’re really shaking, make a martini). If you’re looking for more last-minute  tips and tricks before you head out of the door, why not look in on our list of 20 Top Tips for Meeting your Internet Date for the First Time.

 

Good Luck! (Let us know how it goes in the comments – your story could feature right here in this very blog!)

 

  1. Check there is nothing stuck in your teeth before you leave to meet them. First impressions count!
  2. Make sure your shoes can withstand walking – you never know where the night will take you.
  3. Have a look at this article on What to Wear on your First Date.
  4. If you absolutely have to wear those vertiginous heels for your first date, pack a few plasters into your bag.
  5. While you are packing your bag, stick in some tic tacs or other breath mint…just in case you feel a goodnight kiss could be in order later!
  6. Make sure you can comfortably move around in your outfit. Nothing worse than splitting your trousers as you sit down for dinner.
  7. Check out your dates online profile again before you head out the door for conversation tips and topics.
  8. I don’t advocate speedy getaways through the restaurant bathroom window. If you really can’t stand them, have an excuse ready so you can leave without them losing face.
  9. Make sure a few of your friends or family know where you’re going and when you plan to be back again – have a look at this article on Staying Safe when Online Dating.
  10. Guys, if it’s nippy grab an extra jumper before you leave. Then you can be all romantic and share your coat, without freezing your butt off for your gentlemanly behavior.
  11. Watch the news! Then if all else fails you can discuss the current world happenings with an understanding of what is actually going on.
  12. If you aren’t going for a meal, consider eating an hour or so before you leave to tide you over until you get back. Nothing worse than trying to feel the spark and only getting stomach grumblings instead.
  13. Maybe consider packing a cereal bar into that tiny bag of yours, just in case you start feeling peckish in the taxi on the way home.
  14. Charge your phone!
  15. Check out this dating guide into the mysterious workings of the female mind before you head off to meet your beautiful date.
  16. If you are really stressing out about your date, take 10 minutes to relax and try some meditative breathing techniques (we hear in through the nose and out through the mouth works wonders).
  17. Make sure you leave plenty of time to get ready. Failing that, sort everything out the day before so there are no last minute decisions to be made about what to wear or what to do.
  18. If you are in charge, have you sorted out reservations or bookings? Is everything good to go or do you have a few parts of the date left to sort out?
  19. Feeling out of it after a hard day? Take a quick shower or if you can manage it, book in a swift massage beforehand to chill out and get you back in form.
  20. Freaking out? Sit back with a cup of tea and browse our Top 10 Tips for the First Date article to get you ready for the evening ahead. Good luck!

 

So, you think you are ready. In ‘that place.’ You reckon you are prepared to start dating again.

 

Take our Free and Single quiz to give you an idea of whether you are really ready to handle the excitement of dating, of meeting new people and of putting yourself ‘out there’. It can make you feel vulnerable, so you want to be certain you are in the best possible frame of mind before you jump in the deep end!

 

1) If you bumped into your ex this evening at the pub, what would you do?

 

a) Ignore them completely, pretend you never saw them and walk back to your friends.

 

b) Say ‘hi’, then go on with your trip to the bar and continue with your evening, no harm, no foul.

 

c) Stutter a word that could be ‘hi’, blush and stumble out the door on your way home to eat ice cream.

 

2) Do you find yourself telling others about what went wrong?

 

a) Sometimes, if I’m having a particularly bad day or they seem to be in a similar situation.

 

b) Constantly. If I’m not telling people, I’m thinking about it. All. The. Time.

 

c) Not really, I don’t dwell on it. The past is the past after all!

 

3) Did you learn anything about yourself from your last relationship?

 

a) I found that no matter how hard it gets, I can always survive it.

 

b) I discovered that sometimes you have to compromise.

 

c) I learnt that most everything that went wrong was because of my partner.

 

4) A love song hits the charts. How does it make you feel?

 

a) Broken inside. I used to have that. Now I’ll be alone forever.

 

b) Hopeful. I know what that feels like and I know I’ll feel it again.

 

c) Grumpy. Yeah, yeah, what’s so special about love anyway?

 

5) Picture this: Your ex knocks on your door, they want you back! Do you;

 

a) Invite them in for tea and to discuss their reasons.

 

b) Leap into their arms and accept immediately, no hesitation.

 

c) Politely decline, telling them you had a wonderful relationship but it ended for a reason.

 

 

Tot up your answers to see where your emotional state is…

 

1. a) 2  b) 3  c) 1

2. a) 2  b) 1  c) 3

3. a) 3  b) 2  c) 1

4. a) 1  b) 3   c) 2

5. a) 2  b) 1   c) 3

 

You scored between 12 and 15…

 

Wahey! You’ve taken the time, you’ve accepted the relationship is over and you’re remembering the good times fondly, ready to move on and start dating again!

 

You scored between 8 and 11…

 

Hmm, you’re close and its possible a new path is ready to be taken. Might be better to head for a new coffee shop with your pals or a different class at the gym before diving into dating again though.

 

You scored between 5 and 7…

 

Oh er – you are in no fit state to be entrusting your wellbeing to the success or failure of dates with strangers! Take some more time (ideally a holiday) and try some new things out to get back on track and move on from your ex.

 

I don’t think there is a single person out there who can sashay forth, confident and glorious to every date they go on.

 

At some point, you will feel nervous. This can be compounded by the need to feel you are not wasting your time and the hope that this could be the start of your very own fairy tale.

 

Here are the Free and Single Top Tips for the first date you go on (when you are secretly on a mission to find ‘The One’.)

 

 

1. Don’t Immediately Write Them Off

 

Take the pressure off immediately being struck by the love bug and search for things in common – look to whether you would hang out with this person as a friend, don’t write them off instantly because you had your head set on tall, dark and handsome because your heart may ultimately prefer blondes!

 

2. Seize the Day!

 

Live in the moment! Having plucked up the courage to actually set up an internet dating profile, ‘wink’, message and organise a date, don’t then spend the whole time fast-forwarding to a possible future scenario or thinking about tomorrow’s to-do list. Stay in the moment and really listen to the other person, get to know them and enjoy yourself.

 

3. Feel Good before you Go

 

Regardless of your principles on vanity, make an effort before your date. First off, it’s nice to know you care enough to want to make a good first impression. Knowing you look great and feel like the best you can be can really help your confidence and help you remain calm during the date. Once you have relaxed, you can concentrate on just being yourself and talking to the other person, instead of fussing about what you are wearing or why your hair frizzed up in the rain.

 

Check out our Ten Things to Remember on a First Date for some more advice!

 

Its not just about the money you know. In a relationship where both partners have similar bank balances, there is a sense of equality, an ability to enjoy the same pursuits without worrying who will cover the bill, a path to partnership that couldn’t otherwise be trod.

 

Are you a successful business person? Do you find that relationships inevitably fall apart because of differences in your respective bank accounts? Maybe you were born into wealth and want to be seen for who you are, not what you have.

Dating for Rich Singles

Wealthy Free and Single is specially designed with you in mind. There is no need to worry about gold diggers or insincere feelings. This niche dating site only lets you join if there is proof of your material worth – but we are all about helping you look beyond that, to find the perfect companion who suits your personal worth.

 

Money can’t buy you happiness; everyone knows that old adage. With the right person to share it with however, everything changes. Picture the couples mini breaks you could take, or the sumptuous Michelin starred meals you could enjoy together.

 

Personally though, I’d ditch the money altogether and go on a simple date, secure in the knowledge that you don’t have to push the boat out and impress with expensive champagnes and exotic holidays – because, lets face it, your date already has the ability to indulge in those things themselves.

 

Focus on getting to know each other for the people you are, enjoy each others successes and commiserate when they hit a low point. These are the aspects of a relationship you are looking for. This is what WealthyFreeAndSingle can help you find.